Let’s Write Your Ideal Birth Plan
Whether you plan to give birth in the hospital, a birthing center, or your home, writing a birth plan is always best. In fact, it’s necessary. But, at best, this is the first step in crafting your birth story.
“A goal without a plan is just a wish!”
Although plans don’t always go as intended, when changes arise, we tend to feel less anxious if we already have a plan.
Whenever I connect with a client, we first fill out the ideal birth plan. I tell all my clients it’s essential to understand that all your ideal preferences may not be possible. However, this plan will serve as a guide to help walk you through what is possible for you.
Here are some essential tips for helping you draft your birth plan…
First, start with Your Ideal Delivery Method. Many assume that you automatically go for home birth in the tub when drafting a birth plan. I’m not going to lie; when I first wrote my labor and delivery plan and got into birth work, I thought all the plans would look like that. But that’s not a desire for everyone, nor is it ideal for everyone’s situation.
This brings me to my next point, Ask Your Care Provider What’s Possible. This is likely the most crucial tip when crafting your birth plan. Everybody is different, and unfortunately, preexisting conditions can limit us in our desires and preferences when it comes to childbirth. You need to be direct with your care provider and ask them what’s possible for you. Additionally, you need to ask them if they’re capable of assisting you with your preferences. For example, some care providers are not comfortable or skilled with VBACs (vaginal birth after cesarean). Draft your plan, then ask them what’s possible and what’s not.
After you speak with your care provider about your ideal preferences for your birth plan, regardless of whether your goals are possible or not, you still need to Research Alternatives to Your Preferences. Simply put, things happen! They say, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” With that said, things happen. Emergency cesareans happen all the time. But did you know there’s an option called a ‘gentle cesarean’? RESEARCH! And ask your care provider questions.
Next, Make Sure Your Plan Addresses Before, During, and After. Again, when I first wrote my birth plan, I only focused on what I wanted my birth to look like. I knew I liked music and candles and wanted to be in a tub at home. I had it all planned out, as do most of my clients. After all, we call it a ‘birth plan.’ It only took until after the first client for me to say, “ok, umm, we need to create a Postpartum Preparedness Plan.” This is sort of an “add-on” to your birth plan or an extension instead. We spend a lot of time thinking about what we want our birth to look like, even time spent on how we want to feel before we deliver. Meanwhile postpartum deserves just as much attention. Some things to consider when putting together your postpartum preparedness plan are:
- How long after the baby arrives do you want visitors?
- When you get home, is there a timeframe you want to wait until people can come over?
- Are there any specific meals you can prep ahead of time and freeze for later?
- How long after birth do you want to resume some of your day-to-day activities? (i.e., yoga, walking, etc.)
Eventually, you want to consider and plan for your life once you get home with a brand-new baby.
Next, you need to Make Sure the Plan includes Mom and Baby’s Needs. I can’t stress to my clients enough how often we have to consider ourselves in motherhood. We shift all our attention and energy to the baby as soon as the baby arrives. But remember, you owe your children/family your best self. So when considering what it looks like for a baby postpartum, don’t forget yourself!
Lastly, Revisit Your Plan Regularly and Discuss it with Your Birth Team. Discussing the elements of your birth plan with everyone on your birth team is essential. Clearly state your medical preferences and concerns with your care provider down to your needs, wants, and desires with your partner.
Ultimately, your doula will put a lot of time and effort into this. So hire a doula and let them help you! As a doula, I’m very upfront with my clients. First, I tell them, “Look, I know you’ve planned the baby shower/gender reveal and maternity shoot already…what about the actual birth plan????” Then we get to work!